When country music intersects with Las Vegas, as it does every year for the Academy of Country Music Awards, it truly is a little bit country, a little bit rock & roll, something Donnie & Marie most certainly sing about during their current Vegas headlining residency.
The press room, for those that may not have experienced this unique ‘journalistic’ atmosphere, might not realize what an oftentimes cynical cesspool of commentary this collection of media folk has the power to emit. When yours truly found himself seated next to Robin Leach (of Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous fame), who was covering the awards show for VegasDeluxe.com site, the evening suddenly became surreal and surreal-er.
Part of the evening’s fun involved correcting Leach’s London bastardization of songs and performer’s names. ‘Robin, it’s ‘Miranda,’ not ‘Mirand-er!’ ‘Garth Brooks performed ‘The Dance,’ Robin, not ‘The Don-ce!’ Leach couldn’t wait until Luke Bryan finally came through after the show ended so “this nightmare” could at last be over. In fact, the only question Leach asked any artist all night was whether or not Blake Shelton had pre-approved Mirand-er Lambert’s boob-revealing dress. (Just for the record, and to paraphrase some Seinfeld dialogue, Mrs. Shelton’s natural assets are real and they’re spectacular).
When things get a little dull, it can many times bring out the worst character traits in writers. For instance, after Little Big Town performed in front of a vertical bed backdrop during the broadcast, I quipped to Leach that the name of this band is Little Bed Town. And when there were excruciatingly long stretches between artist appearances backstage, I began to sing to myself -- to the tune of a recent Lady A hit -- ‘Why don’t the artists come backstage anymore?’ I also had the grand idea of trying to convince Leach to perform cowboy karaoke -- something easy, like Johnny Cash’s “Ring of Fire” -- whenever action slowed to a crawl, only to have Leach emphatically refuse. I really wish I could write about Leach butchering Cash, but it was not to be. TV show coverage can really be a burning thing, though.
All kidding aside, however, Mr. Leach is actually a true gentleman. He doesn’t take himself too seriously, and I can’t think of anyone else I’d want sitting next to me during a too-quiet press room setting. Robin: Same time next year?
Ah, if only more reporters had even a small percentage of Leach’s wit and style! If I had a dime for every time one of them asked a bad question tonight like, ‘So how does it feel to win [fill in the award name],’ I’d be a millionaire, but the most frustrated millionaire you ever met. For instance I made Little Big Town laugh when I wondered if they were worried about how a lot of the country doesn’t even know what a pontoon is, which could have then jeopardized the success of the single of the same name. Now really, how hard is it to come up with a question that doesn’t include the words ‘how does it feel’ in it?
Some backstage experiences are simply priceless, however, such as the sight of Luke Bryan, after he’d just won the Entertainer of the Year trophy. He had such an obvious glow about him; it was a privilege just to bask in that glow along with him.
There you have it: The good, bad and ugly of reporting on the lifestyles of country music’s rich and famous. Just nobody ask me how it makes me feel!
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